For those of you who have heard me speak you know that I am usually so rushed for time that every moment is crammed with content and laughter. I rarely have time to let people know the answers to their questions of ‘how can I share this with my family?”! Or more commonly, “WHERE CAN I BUY A WAND!”. LOL! These ideas are all about making another person feel special, and that is a great start for a wonderful holiday season.
So as a stress busting gift for you, I have decided to share with you a range of gift ideas that can take away some of the time consuming shopping that has to be done in the lead up to one of the most stressful (or fun), times of the year, Christmas (SHOULD I MENTION ANYTHING ABOUT JEWISH OR ARAB PEOPLE, DO THEY HAVE HANNUKA AND RAMADAM INSTEAD?? AM NOT SURE HOW TO ADDRESS THAT ISSUE).
We thought of the song the 12 days of Christmas and thought it might be fun to play with the 12 different types of gifts you can give for Christmas..so here goes! (plus some ideas of gifts you might find on our website that spread the message of joy and living and leading out loud!)
THE overall theme of the gifts is generosity, not from your pocket but from your heart. These gifts are all gifts of the heart. You need spend no money at all, but they take time, caring, love and effort. That’s what makes them special gifts that will be remembered for years.
- The gift of encouragement, if we examine the word en-courage..it’s meaning is to put courage in. So when we encourage someone we are actually sharing with them the gift of courage. Everyone is fighting a hard battle out there today no matter how easy they make it look, encourage EVERYONE you meet, in small or large ways. Thank them ; tell them they did a great job; comment on a specific action or their appearance or smile; acknowledge them in some small way by noticing what they did and letting them know you appreciated it or admired it. We are all filled with light and if we shine our light on others it makes them brighter. Be generous with your light! When you encourage you also motivate. Make sure that you see the silent ‘TA DA’s’ that everyone is doing, look for them and even if you can’t see it, know they are doing it and acknowledge it. Just making someone feel special is motivating and encouraging for them, so write them a note telling them how much you care about them and special moments you remember.
- The gift of learning, most people love to learn and are stimulated and excited when they do. Find educational books or DVD’s or videos (maybe the Brain Sex video or any of those in our series) ; give someone classes in something they have wanted to do for a long time, or book a couple of you into massage classes; or art classes;or pottery classes; or yoga or pilates classes; or cooking classes, or anything that you could do together and enjoy. One of the best gifts of all would be to book you and your partner/friend/child /parent into a course you know they want to do but you are not so keen! They would be so honored with that gift of the heart!
- The gift of laughter, give someone a comedy video or DVD, a laughter tape or make a skit for them that is very funny! Make your own joke book or put together a photo album of your funniest moments together; maybe make your own funniest home video show! Play charades once a week and see how much fun you can have; go to see comedy movies together; ask each other ‘ what’s the funniest thing that happened to you today’; give them a ‘funny diary’ - a book into which they write funny things that happen every day. Life is full of funny moments and incidences- if only we would look for them. If we put out attention on looking for the fun in life, we will find it! Teach others to look at the funny side of situations, maybe in the book you divide the pages into 2 halves, on one half you write an incident that didn’t seem to be funny and on the other you write what you can find within that situation that COULD be funny! Or at least humorous! It’s worth a try, and it may just turn some grumpy people around!
4.The gift of connecting, do something special to connect...share something you love about the other person, take time out to talk to them ‘ ask them a personal question...ask how their children are and name them if you can; show an interest in their hobbies or comment on something positive they have done at work; one of the best ways to connect with someone is to actually listen to them - so few people really listen these days that it feels extraordinary to have someone truly connect and listen to you. Some hints on how to do this. First as Stephen covey says ‘listen with your eyes for feelings’. We must ‘listen’ to body language and words and the heart of the other person and then respond to the feelings. You will be amazed at the impact it has on the relationship and to that particualr interaction. Another great tip, when you are listening , as Michael Grinder taught me, when the other person stops speaking, look down, nod and count to 5 as you are thinking about what they said and if they don’t say anything at that time then, you can speak. It’s amazing how much more information they will share with you waiting that little bit of time!
5.The gift of sight!(OR SEEING?) - ‘it is only with the heart that one can see rightly. What is essential is invisible to the eye” antoine st exupury wrote this in the wonderful book called the Little Prince. ....it will transform your relationships and be such a special gift if you try to see people through your heart. See them for who they really are, not just what their personality or mood tells you! Even if they are driving you nuts, try to see the inner being that is all good and respond to that being. WHO people are is NOT how they behave! Although it can often fool us! Strive always to see the real person at their core and watch your relationships transform. Hint on gift! We have these wonderful glasses cases for those of us who can no longer read without magnifying assistance! They are attractive , hang around your neck and stopped me forever losing my glasses! I love them and use mine all the time and am constantly asked ‘where did you buy that?’....they are unique and very useful!
(somer better order some more glasses cases just in case, everything I wear mine I have comments from people and requests from where to buy them)
6 The gift of endor-friends, something that you can give to keep them laughing! Endorphins are the body’s natural happy drugs! They make us feel terrific and can only be released by humans. You could exercise hard and release endorphins - or promise to exercise with your mate as a gift or you could buy them this little ‘friend’!! (or do both!) Press his little hand and he laughs out loud for you and cheers you up, sit him on your desk or computer or by the bed and whenever you need a lift, make him laugh and he’ll make you laugh!, wave him at others to cheer them up as well! Keep him with you while you are exercising so you can cheer yourself up until the real endorphins kick in! When tempted to throw him against the wall in a fit of frustration with someone else, STOP, and press his hand (gently!) and laugh instead!
7 The gift of building a bridge and dropping your potatoes, imagine the joy of your family or partner when you let go of something that has been bothering you for ages? Particularly is it’s a grudge or ‘thing’ you hold against them! Letting go of stuff you have been carrying forever, building a bridge and getting over it are awesome gifts! Maybe it’s some habit your partner/family/child/friend has that you can decide you will no longer let bother you..or you decide to make up with a parent or child or relative or friend that you know will make everyone feel better; or forgive someone for a past hurt or event; or if someone did something to you when you were young and you remain bitter and twisted over it, build a bridge and get over it! Holding onto stuff that has happened to you in the past makes you ill, no one else!! It hurts others only in that they have to put up with you being all bitter! So get over it and let go and start the year with a fresh, clear and new heart. Give them a written certificate stating that you are officially ‘over it’! Watch their faces light up!
8 The gift of stress busting, when you know someone is under pressure or having a tough time or feeling tense, do something that you know will ease their stress! It might be making them laugh; giving them a massage; doing something that you know they are going to have to do and saving them some time; make a meal for them; buy a relaxation tape/CD or sleep better CD; offer to help them in some way, ask them what you can do to help; for one whole week or month avoid doing anything that you know annoys them; write them a note telling them you will do this! Do some household task that they would have to do if you didn’t; buy them some relaxing aromatherapy oil and a burner so they can smell their way to relaxation; make a special effort not to react to their short fuse or sharp voice tone when you know they are tired and stressed; offer to babysit the children while they go out for an evening on their own, or to sleep a whole night though! There are a million things you can do to help someone else sstay calm and relax if only you would look for it and be generous.
9 The gift of making a difference, what can you do to make a difference to someone else’s life? It can be a tiny thing, you don’t’ have to do anything big or impressive, small things can make the biggest difference sometimes, calling a family member you haven’t spoken to for a while; or with whom you had cross words and reconnecting; tell them they make a difference to you and how; write a note to someone you care for telling them what they mean to you and recalling special moments and times together. Would it make a difference to someone if you were happy each day, instead of coming in from work grumpy or tired or upset? Would it make a difference if you acknowledged another in some special way? A simple smile, a look of love, a hug - a gentle touch can all make the world of difference to another person, so do it! (more than once!!)
10 The gift of optimism, so many people walk around today grumpy and miserable. When you greet people - don’t just say ‘hi what’s up’ or ‘ole!’ but instead ,with real energy yourself, ask them “what’s best thing that happened to you today?” - they may look a little blankly at you the first time you ask..but ask again! And watch them smile as they go through their day searching for the best thing. This is an awesome gift for your children, it’s not easy to teach optimism, we have to model it and not too many folks are good at modelling a happy state these days! Make this a daily routine at work and at home. You may wish to consider giving a Gratitude journal, a book that you can create from a book full of blank pages...decorate it yourself for that personal touch, write down things about that person for which YOU are grateful as a start; write a note to them telling them what the gratitude journal is for, a way to remind people of joy in life; the joy they bring to you and how there is joy in every day if we just choose to look for it.
11 The gift of time, it’s the greatest gift you can give anyone, time...it’s the most precious commodity we have and the one that means more than anything to your spouse/partner/children /parents and friends. Give them a diary with a set time of the week blocked out just for them. Make an appointment to see them regularly - if it can’t be once a week; take time out of your busy schedule to really BE with the other person without distraction or cell phones or pagers or blackberries going off every five minutes;
Promise to be a soccer or tennis games and other sporting events and BE there; go out to dinner with your partner and children so you have family time or go to the park together and play, better still! If you travel a lot ,buy a video phone so you can spend time face to face with your spouse and children even if you are not actually there. Ring your parents every week, when they are gone you will miss them more than you ever imagined and you may regret not calling them when you could. Stay in touch with your friends, they are more precious than gold. Value them, honor them and tell them how much they mean to you. The time you give to someone you love will make them feel special and will feed back to you and recharge your own batteries.
12 The gift of kindness; like time, this is one of the greatest gifts you can bestow. Kindness is the overriding quality in my husband and I am eternally grateful for that - it affects every one of our interactions and unfortunately for him, I am not nearly so kind! But he serves as a great model for me and I am working on improving! Behaving with kindness is a choice. Before you act, stop , breathe and feel whether what you are about to do, is kind. Will it hurt or anger the other person? Will it lift their spirit or dampen it? Will it make them laugh and feel good about themselves or will it leave them wounded or feeling inferior or stupid? Would it be better to say nothing and make an effort to see the best in the other person; or to assume that their intentions were good? Give them the benefit of the doubt; smile at them with warmth and love; apologize if you need to (even if you are not wrong!) ; there are a million ways to be kind to someone else, even strangers. Make a ‘comittment to being kind’ card and present it as the gift! Watch their faces light up! Make a decision today to be kind for the whole year, to everyone! You may be surprised at how good it feels and how quickly it changes your world.
It is impossible to give from your heart without receiving! With all of the gifts I have mentioned above, the more care and love and attention you put in, the more benefits you receive, although that is not the reason you are doing it of course!
This may be the cheapest Christmas for you in terms of spending money on presents, but they may be the most profound and appreciated gifts that you will ever give.
No matter what religion you are, and when your holiday season is, gifts of the heart can change someone’s life. Including yours!
Blessings and En-joy. (which means put the joy in!)
You may find the perfect gift of the heart or supplement to your heart gift in one of amanda’s many videos , audido series , books or ‘toys’. A magic wand could accompany a gift of optimism or encouragement or laughter. Sparky ears may remind someone that they are special to you; Wally ears might help them learn optimism! Our kits are designed so they can be used for the whole family to watch or your whole team so all can share the messages. Be creative and make some personal gift for everyone you love and if we can help you reinforce the message, it is our joy!
