On Sunday this week, I was very excited as it was the first weekend I had had at home for two months and I could visit my adopted family inDallas. One of the loves of my life - my Goddaughter Isabella, lives there. (Ken is the other!)
She is three and PERFECT! Not that I am biased. She has brought so much joy into my life that I have pictures of her (and my fiance’) all over my house and all I have to do is look at them and I feel better. She does have an older sister Alex, who is five and amazingly talented and a six year old brother Max, who is an extraordinary sportsperson, by the way, they are both wonderful as well! I know, I am biased!
Well, as usual, I arrive and sing out YOOO HOOO and Isabella yells out “MANDA” from somewhere inside. I hear little footsteps...and my heart begins to pound! Then it explodes with joy as I see her little body running towards me, face sparkling with an excited grin, arms open wide, of course, I am doing the same to her and it’s like one of those movies where you see two lovers running towards each other in slow motion across a field! Then I scoop her up in my arms and we circle around a bit. NOTE: if you have not had this experience with a child, you MUST find one who will love you enough to do it!! Life offers many other ways to experience joy, but this has to be one of the very best.
There is no other experience like it for me and I am so grateful that my ‘sister’ and ‘brother’ in Dallas (Isabella’s parents), enjoy this as much as I do, they are very gracious and I am very blessed.
It just happened to be a gorgeous day, the temperature was about 60 degrees and the sun was shining. We decided to go for a walk and while we were waiting for Mom to stretch (she was running, I was walking. I’m older!), Isabella and I were dancing around outside and I was so happy I started singing (I am not a good singer by the way but thankfully she didn’t care!)
‘It’s a beautiful day to be outside…
It’s a beautiful day to be alive” repeatedly,
to a pretty bad tune which I had made up for the moment! So we tangoed to this tune, we waltzed, we rock-n-rolled and we laughed and laughed a lot!
We started our walk after that and I thought no more of the song.
About 30 minutes later we are heading back from our ‘walk’, which really had turned into a stroll/wander (hugging session) along the lake shore looking at boats and ducks...MUCH more valuable for the heart than a fast cardiovascular walk!, and I see my little angel ahead of me all by herself singing and dancing to:
"It’s a bootiful day to be ouside,
It’s a bootiful day to be alive!
Ok, so even if you think I am really, really, soppy, the parents out there will be smiling at the memories of these times they have had. And if you have a new baby, make sure that you teach them this life skill of joy in the moment, of having joy in your heart no matter what is going on, no matter what clouds are covering your life right now.
The day after this glorious medicine for my heart, I had to fly somewhere and the weather in Dallas was gloomy and cloudy. As the plane took off, it was not long before we broke through the clouds. Suddenly, the sun was everywhere, the sky was an electric blue and the clouds were gone...and it came to me:
It’s always sunny above the clouds!
And it is! A blinding flash of the obvious! I fly most days of the week and no matter what the weather is like on the ground, it’s always sunny above any clouds anywhere! (Unless of course it’s night time for those pedants out there!)
And then I thought what a great metaphor it is for life. What if we believed it, and taught our children ‘it’s always sunny above the clouds’, so we just have to wait for the clouds to pass and have faith that the sun will soon be back. It always, always, always comes back; it may take a few days but it always shines again.
If you look at the problems in your life as clouds, sometimes they are big and black and full of thunder, and they are scary….(I have had a few of those in my life). Sometimes they are just thick and heavy and last for what seems like forever, but it never is forever!
In winter, when there is snow and ice and drabness everywhere, it’s still sunny above the clouds, just remember that! And then be patient; the sun will shine again soon and the clouds will pass. Remember the saying “this too shall pass”, I thought it came from the Bible but I could not find any reference to it in my concordances.
I rang my living Bible expert, George, who couldn’t find that exact reference either (and he used a computer!), so we both concluded that it was one of those that everyone thinks comes from the Bible, but in fact seems to come from the wisdom of life! Let me know if we are wrong and you know it IS in there! Either way, it’s a good thing to think! And to teach children as a life skill. Not to mention, to have as a grown-up life skill yourself!
When things in your life seem cloudy and gray, what do you say to yourself? Do you think doom and gloom …do you say “the sun is never going to shine again”? (You are wrong about that of course!). Do you tell yourself that things are terrible, awful and with ‘your luck’ things will never get better?
Do you ‘catastrophise’ everything? Something happens in your life and it’s of medium ‘badness’ (!), and you make it the greatest living drama since the plague?
Are you the sort of person that walks around with ‘clouds‘ hanging over your head, EVEN when the sun IS shining outside?
If you are, odds are that you are in the very nasty habit of telling yourself bad ‘stuff’ about everything and everyone. You LOOK for the bad, the difficulties, and the miserable aspects. You pride yourself on being skeptical, or maybe cynical, “no one will pull the wool over your eyes!”
WRONG! Being negative or cynical about everything, even most things will make you sick and, more importantly, a miserable person to be around! So STOP IT!
It’s wise to be skeptical under certain circumstances, but if it’s a permanent habit, you join the ranks of the cynical.
What do you want to teach your children? Do you want to teach your children to be cynical, to grumble and be bitter because it’s been cloudy for a while, in your life or in the sky?
It’s hard to do that to toddlers because they know better, but you sew the seeds at that age.
And by the time they are 6 or 7 or 8, you can see anxiety and stress and misery emerging because they once knew that they sun would always shine …but they have learned (from you or others looking after them), that life is just gray, difficult, cloudy and miserable, even when the sun IS shining.
Would you rather teach them to dance and sing outside and celebrate when the sun DOES come out, and have them strong in the faith that the sun WILL shine always…..always.
It will always come after the clouds, it is always sunny above the clouds, they just have to reach above the cloudy level and find, look for, or wait for the sun.
PS: You can prove it to them as well! Next time you see fabulous, magical rays of sun emerging from clouds, say to them ‘’see Darling, it’s sunny above the clouds! It’s always sunny above the clouds!” Embed that message in them. And give them resilience against depression, stress and anxiety, it’s any adult’s job!
For those of you that are interested, we just released a special product to help remind you, your children, and your employees to look for the sun above the clouds! Do you remember "Winnie the Pooh"? Well, the story was full of special characters with special traits! My favorite was "Tigger" - always bouncing around, full of joy! Then there was "Eeyore" who moped around with clouds following him everywhere. Be a "Tigger" full of joy or an "Eeyore", it is your choice! AND if you are having a REALLY bad day, you might have "Eeyore" feelings inside, but you can always put on your "Tigger" face!
Sunshine and Tigger's for all!!
