If there was something you could do that you know would make your partner , parent, friend or child feel that they were really special to you, what would it be?
I think this is a great dinner table topic! Ask everyone in your family tonight 'what makes you think and feel that you are really special to me?' Then on Valentine's Day , do it! Watch the glow in their faces - it will keep you going for months.
Traditionally, Valentine's day is for couples or lovers - are they the same? I wonder if in many of our relationships we are so caught up in the speed of life that we become ‘just’ a couple and forget that we started out as lovers! It’s possible to be both! And with the word lovers, I do not mean just in the sexual sense of the word.
Lovers stare at each other with a sort of 'you're so wonderful ' look! They hang on each others words; they smile and laugh a lot with each other; they ignore small details that later become major issues (I'm sure he didn't burp in the beginning..etc); they laugh at each other's jokes; they 'make eyes at each other' across a table; they play footsies under the table; they go all soppy when they look at each other and smile when they hear voice messages from each other; they touch all the time; they call for no reason - a lot; they talk and share everything that happened to them during the day etc.
Are you a couple or lovers? Or both? Maybe for Valentine's Day you could remember what you did as lovers and become lovers again - just for the day! But hopefully for longer. Being lovers requires effort, but it’s worth it.
A great friend of mine, Belinda, thinks that Valentine's Day is for giving love to those who don't have it in their lives - those without love or partners. Perhaps you could send a card or two to friends - anonymously of course! I must say there have been some years (a while ago now) when I have received four or five cards and had no idea who sent them! Very frustrating, but exciting! And it made me feel great!
And flowers delivered to the workplace are not unique but score lots of points because everyone notices and comments on your fortune! Even for the men.
If you are searching for something different.... try taking your partner out to dinner and then driving to a romantic secluded spot and giving them their present. (This happened to me once and it's a night I'll never forget - not only because of the location but also the words on the card and the special effort he made to make it a surprise) .
What makes your partner feel really special? Whatever it is , do it on Valentine's Day - come home early; plan a romantic picnic; go to dinner on a yacht; take a water taxi rather than drive; plan a surprise and blindfold them as you arrive at the special spot; go to the first place you ever met; dress in fabulously sexy clothes and be home alone (having arranged a baby sitter); cook a special meal and have candles on the table; have champagne and a gorgeous meal set up on a table on a cliff somewhere; fill his or her car with 'I love you' balloons and wrap the whole thing with a ribbon and cover it with paper hearts - while it's parked at work (I did this one too - I had a whole neighbourhood cheering me on!); buy a beautiful vase and fill it with little bits of paper on which you have written a quality you love about that person; give them vouchers you have made yourself offering things you know they love - a massage, nights of hugs, nights of passion, dinner out, long hot baths, find out your partners favorite romantic fantasies and make them happen!
In short, both men and women want to know how special they are to their partner. How we make each other feel special is very different. Generally speaking, men are very visual so wearing sexy clothes and creating a sexy atmosphere (music, candles, lustful looks etc) are sure winners.
Women long for intimacy and romance as a prelude to sex so take you time fellas and do things that will make her eyes sparkle as she looks at you (remember when you were lovers?) ; things that will make her feel she is the most important thing to you in the whole world - more than work, sport and your mates! You'll feel a million dollars and so will she.
Use Valentine's Day to become lovers again- even if it's only for a day. Or just give love to someone who needs it, even if it's yourself!
