From Amanda's very early writing (1990s to early 2000s), shared as it was originally written.
Attitude is a habit of thinking
At a conference I attended today, I heard a great presentation by a man
who had led an exciting life. He talked about his youth when he was a tough young man who had a good punch but a bad attitude. Then he discovered alcohol , so now he had a bad punch and a bad attitude. A short spell in the 'clink' and an encounter with some inmates led to a substantial adjustment in his attitude!
DAvid at conf
Young good punch bad attitude; plus alcohol = bad punch bad attitude
can change
His description of attitude was that it was simply a habit of thinking. I thought that was great. OF course it is. That's exactly what an attitude is - it's a way of thinking that has become a habit. And like habits, they can be changed. He believes (and I agree with him) that loepards may not change their spots but humans can!
I have seen many people change the way they think, belkieve, act and feel - but htey must be commited to the change. Lots of people can pretend to make changes but
they don't have a genuine interest in sustaining the change. They're the ones who give those of us who do cahnge a bad name!
So how are your habits of thinking? Do you perpetually expect the worst? Worry about what will happen? Always look for the down side? Expect to see the 'dark' side of everybody sooner or later? Believe that no one is really trustworthy? Or are you generally optimistic? You see the up side, the silver lining? You fill your mind with pleasant thoughts?
Are you happy with the way you think? Or do you think you may experience more joy , or peace anyway if you 'could' think differently? Recently, when I was being interviewed for my book 'You Can Be Happy ', I was asked a billion times how can you be happy?
My first suggestion was to become aware of how you thought - about happiness. What did happiness mean to you and how did you view yoru current state of mind? Are you looking for happiness in some external event, or do you realize it's in your head and perception and most importantly , your heart?
your and heart In other words, what is your attitude to happiness? Do you deserve it? Is it possible in your life? How do you feel when you are happy?
If you were going to change your attitude to anything - how would y ou begin? No point in just turning the TV off if there is a soul shocking program becuase we keep mentally seeing it. Better to change to aniother station and fill our vision and hearing with a more pleasant concept. Same with our hearts and minds. Replace the old habitual thinking with another form; or replace it with loving thoughts - replace the old with what you would like to have as the new.
And then it's practice , practice, practice! Just like changing any other habit. Write notes to yourself and put them on your mirror; in your car; on your desk or on a wall where you will see it daily. Become aware of any moment when you slip back into the old pattern and catch yoruself - immediately substitute the new habit for the old. Tell others you are changing and ask for their support and assistance.
leopardsbelievetheycommittedchangeitude to anything - how would youbecauseanotheryourself Be gentle and patient with yourself - it takes time to change old , well entrenched habits.
With your commitment to change, there's no doubt you'll end up with a great punch and a great attitude - so you'll never need the punch!
