From Amanda's very early writing (1990s to early 2000s), shared as it was originally written.
NEEDS WORK
Have you ever been in a situation where you desparately wanted something to happen? And the more you wanted it to happen , the more it seemed to elude you?
It's the old 'single but looking' story! I bet we have either all been in this situation or we know someone who was (or is). And of course, when we are hoping for a white knight or a princess to grace our lives , all white knights and princesses somehow communicate and immediately dissapear from the scene!
The minute we really , really want something we send out non verbal messages screaming 'desparately wanting' which scares the majority of 'prospects' away. Not only that, but our focus changes - in fact, it narrows so much that what we want becomes all we can think about, dream about, or talk about. Our perspective changes - we become self absorbed and selfish and lose sight of all sorts of alternative possibilities.
A key question to ask ourselves (or our friends or loved ones) when we find ourselves (or them) in this condition is "what would having 'x' do for me?". Think seriously about the answer because it may open your eyes to other options that could give you the same benefit; which takes away the 'desperateness' and renders you attractive and appealing again.
What about if you are in a personal relationship already? Ad you really want soemthing to be your way?
und you really want something to be the YOU want it to be; and you really , really feel passionately about it Well, sometimes it works for you. But most humans react in a perverse way - subconsciously! If you are trying to sweep them along with your way of thinking, or with each other at some 'higher' level (or relaxed, sane and sensible ) to get them to do something they are not convinced they want to do, the more you push, the more they push back! The Chinese have many sayings about water -
this one highlights my message:
"Nothing under heaven is more yielding than water;
But when it attacks things hard and resistant,
There is not one of them that can prevail.
That the yeilding conquers the resistant
And the soft conquers the hard
Is a fact known by all men,
But utilized by none."
In other words, the more we try too hard, the more we push things, the more we need and desperately want something, the less chance we have of achieving what we want.
However, this does not mean we don't ever try again or want anything! It means we must think and be clear about what we want and then let go of our need. By being really precise about what we want, our subconscious minds can go about the business of getting what w ewant
Or you were frantically trying to remember the name of a person/ show/ program and it wouldn't came off the tip of your tongue.........until you forgot about it and concentrated on something else?of getting what w - easily and without effort.For example, have you ever beenAnd, two days later, in the middle of another activity/ conversation you suddely remember and inappropriately call out the name!
Our subconscious minds never rest. They are constantly recognizing, processing and absorbing information , and simultaneously releasing data so we can converse intellignetly at the same time. The subconsious mind worksiness
Or someone says to you "have you seen that new TV advertisement on green pigs (for example)' and you answer 'no' cos you haven't! From that moment on, every time you turn on the TV you see the 'green pigs'ad! Not because that's the first time it's been on TV while you were watching, but because your subconscious mind is now tuned in to register it when you see it. You have looked at the as before but you've never seen it.
As soon as your subconscious mind has some issue/idea/concept/thing to scan for, it registers a 'target' and files everything that happens to you away and the next time you come across the issue etc, your subconscious mind goes DING! ALERT! - and we become aware of the target.
work to recognize, process absorbevery thing that happens to us and simultaneously release - and coordinate -ta so we can function effectively at the same time we are noticing everything. They also work to store everything that happens to us and when we need to remember something, it has archives through which it can search to retrieve the data - just like the computer. The difference is that a computer will take the time it needs and we are patient. Our subconscious minds take time as well, but the quicker we want the answer, the more we really want the answer, the further away it goes!
My mate Denis, the young CEO of a successful, rapidly growing Company who told me the story about
@@, think and imagine very clearly what you want so your subconscious mind has a specific target and as m(Herb Cohen, and is who runs his business in this way) says... "It's reeeally , reeeally important to care - but not that much!"
In other words, lighten up, have fun as you work, learn to let go - relax, breathe and let your subconscious mind do it's job uinhindered. You'll be amazed at how well the human system works when its used properly.
