From Amanda's very early writing (1990s to early 2000s), shared as it was originally written.
139 Unplugged
I was speaking at a computer industry conference recently and was impressed with their conference theme which was ‘unplugged’! Its purpose was to send a message that although technological advances like the internet allowed us greater than ever ability to communicate, there was still a need to ‘turn off’, literally and metaphorically.
Think about it. We had phones. Then answering machines. Then pagers. Then faxes revolutionised our communication systems, we could send and receive instantly. Then came mobile phones. Now we could be connected to anyone, anywhere , anytime, there was no escape. And if they missed you , they always had voice mail. Next came the internet and email. Now it’s literally instantaneous contact, in writing , image or by voice.
There is no escape. Aaaaaagh! People sneer I’ve left you messages; I’ve called five times (in the last 2 hours); where have you been etc.
Time out folks, that’s what we need, unplugged time out! Unplug the mobile phone (or just turn it off, an incredibly difficult feat for many people); turn off the computer and check your email tomorrow; don’t look at the fax machine for a day; don’t check your answering machine until tomorrow. Have a day with your family , friends or just by yourself without any technological interruptions.
I realize that there are many advantages to all these gizmos, but not 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Sure a mobile phone may enable you to go to your children’s sport and watch them but what use is it if you are so busy on the phone all the time, you missed all the action? If you saw the corporate guru that Robyn Williamson played in Peter Pan you’ll understand what I mean.
One of the most effective ways to unplug , which then allows you to restore your inner calm and centeredness is to have time alone, a little solitude. To quote from a Psychology Today article by Esther Buchholz in the Jan/Feb 1998 edition “We live in a society that worships independence yet deeply fears alienation..”
We think that being alone equals lonely. Wrong! Mothers of young children will understand the truth of this! To have half an hour alone while the children are sleeping is a luxury. Unfortunately instead of being able to stop and recharge in that time, they tend to rush frantically getting everything done that they can’t do while the children are awake!
We need time alone to recharge our own batteries; to satisfy our own needs; to stop and breathe; to let our souls catch up with our bodies. And for a zillion other reasons.
So how do you unplug? How can you create alone time for yourself? Just do it! Mark time off in your diary. Go for a walk without any pagers, phones, computers or pencils even! All your messages will be there on your return, never fear! Create a daily or weekly ritual which allows you time by yourself, at home or in your office. Set up your email to scan for junk mail; put the voice mail on for an hour and shut your door with a sign that says ‘I’m out for an hour, please come back then’! Organize a baby sitter once a week during the day so you can lie in the sun and do nothing or read the paper uninterrupted. Learn to meditate, it’s a great way to recharge while you are alone. Do something that makes you feel great.
Try leaving a message that says “I’m away at the moment and won’t be back for a week. This machine is not set up to record messages this week. Talk to you next week.” Buchholz has written a book called “The Call of Solitude” that may help those who panic on finding themselves alone. It’s full of good practical suggestions.
Remember above all, being alone does not equal lonely. You can be desperately lonely in a crowded city , a busy office or at home. For some, alone time equals fear, abandonment, discomfort, a sense of loss, and disconnection. But the truth is that time by yourself, (and here’s the key) with yourself is a wonderful way to redress the balance of busy, demanding lifestyles. Not to mention , stay sane!
Persevere with the initial discomfort, the rewards of alone time are great.
